Terrence Marks

Secondly, I realized how long it's been since I had three days I could waste like that. (And it is - the 20 minutes of actual shopping they do may be great, but the three days of waiting is wasted). I never camped out in line, and the last time I had that kind of time, I couldn't afford a TV. (Didn't have one for a few years - how do you think I had so much free time?). Now? I've been meaning to update the You Say it First FAQ for months. It says the answer to "Are Kimberly and Brisbane sleeping together?" is "Probably not". They've been married for a year and a half now, and trust me, it would've come up if they weren't. We owe you a con report from two weeks ago. The only reason this is getting written tonight is because it's rather time-sensitive.

I was telling Isabel all this (I talk a lot. If it's good, I write it down.) She reminds me, "You do realize you went to Strategicon about three months ago, right?".

"Well, yeah. Three days of gaming. But I didn't get to play the first day."

"And whose fault is that?"

"Mine. And I could have bought a TV instead, but my point stands".

Anyhow, if they started a game now, I bet they could get to ninth level by the time the sale starts.

• Mort


• Night Watch


• The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents


• Guards! Guards!


• Men at Arms


• Interesting Times


• Wyrd Sisters


• Going Postal


• The Truth


• Pyramids


• Hogfather


• Lords and Ladies


• Carpe Jugulum


• Jingo


• Monstrous Regiment


• Reaper Man


• Making Money


• Feet of Clay


• The Fifth Elephant


• Thief of Time


• Thud!


• Maskerade


• The Last Continent


• Faust Eric

What say you?

Normally, I don't do this, but it's been kind of a busy week for me.

Firstly, after six months of downtime, The Nice's forums have been brought back and upgraded from UBB6 to phpBB3. There was a server crash in October that brought our old forums down, so we've moved to a more stable and maintainable system - and from a collection of thousands of text files to a real database. The old forum is available in read-only mode for private messages (which couldn't be migrated) and anything else we may have missed.

Secondly, the entire archives of Unlike Minerva are back online. For the last few years we only had an edited version up, which didn't include the original pre-restart beginning. Since we've got the tenth anniversary coming up on March 15th, it's only fair to show what it's the anniversary of. This also puts Unlike Minerva and its sequel, You Say it First at over 2000 comics, combined.

Thirdly, we're running Unlike Minerva with commentary, Monday through Friday at UnlikeMinerva.com. It'll be at quintuple-speed, with a new week of comics up every day.

Fourthly, to celebrate the fourth anniversary of NamirDeiter.net, our reward site for donors, we've got a special this month only - subscribe at $4/month for as long as you like, or, if you donate $10, get free online access to one of our past bonus books.

Fifthly, we've got a public tour of NamirDeiter.net. Because after four years, there's probably a lot of people curious as to what's inside.  I'm sure it's not the first bonus site, and it's probably not the biggest, but there's an awful lot there at the moment.

Sixthly, people keep asking us: "Isabel has drawn how many comics?". We've got a running total now. Currently it's 5713, or about 27 centiHolbrooks.

Reading (books): Finished Coraline (which we also saw the movie of, and enjoyed). Isabel got me a very nice set of Terry Pratchett books for Christmas; I've gotten as far as Reaper Man so far. I had a smaller set when I was younger. It's funny; I remembered Carrot being the main character in Guards! Guards!. Re-reading it, the main conflict is Vimes vs. Wonse (and, to a lesser extend Vimes vs. Vimes), and Carrot is, like many others, an interesting secondary character but not the focal point that I thought he was.

Reading (manga): I was reading dozens of series at a time. I've put most of them down, so I can actually read something from start to finish. I recently finished Hiatari Ryoukou and Adventure Boys, both by Mitsuru Adachi. Currently reading Nine (which is his first solo series). I've mentioned Mitsuru Adachi before; he's done about a dozen sports romance series. I've read half of them They're about as different as You Say it First and Namir Deiter. So far, Nine is my second-favorite series of his after Rough. We've been reading Gokusen, as well, and picked up the anime. I recommend it, and wonder why the manga hasn't been licensed.

Playing (MMORPG): Trying Lord of the Rings Online. I need to get my thoughts on Asda Story and Final Fantasy XI written out.

Playing (console): Trying to play all the console games we have before getting more. Finished Sly Cooper 2 - would post my thoughts on the ending if I thought it'd be of general interest. Thinking about playing Sly 3, but they changed one of the voice actors. If I wait a month, it'll sound less wrong. Finished Mega Man X, X2, and X3, so that I could unlock Battle & Chase for Isabel, because it's supposed to contain Roll's Theme. It doesn't. Finished Mega Man 9, despite the fact that I gave up on Mega Man 4 when I tried to play through all of them.

I was playing Animal Crossing: City Folk until I found out about Animal Tracks. The idea is that if you run on the same route every time, it'll wear down the grass and create a path. Unfortunately, the grass damage is applied every time the game is loaded and now 80% of our town looks like a desert. I'm playing a lot less now. The idea of a thin trail running from point A to point B is cute. A townful of bare dirt isn't.

Playing (handheld): Finished WarioWare: Touched (and by 'finished' I mean I unlocked most things and didn't care to grind for the other 10%). Playing Advance Wars 1, at least until I get a new game that can be played in 15-minute intervals.

Bad guy: I have a Space Chess set. You heroes are going to be my chess pieces or I'll kill one of you.

Hero: No, bad guy. We refuse to play your game.

Then the bad guy kills Ice, to show everyone that he's serious and for-real. Then the heroes play the game. It was one of the most anticlimactic, pointless deaths this side of Tasha Yar. It'd be as if the microwave really exploded, killing Brisbane and Kimberly, ending You Say it First. I got the next issue in the hopes that it would be a regular comic-book fake death. It wasn't. She is, as I understand it, still dead.

Every few years I get the urge to get back into comics. I poke around a bit on what's happened. Invariably "what's happened" means that a few more of my favorite characters died. It's not just that they died, but that they tended to die pointless deaths in arcs that got very bad reviews. The deaths weren't stories. They were punctuation in other peoples' stories, like putting an exclamation point in the middle of a sentence! in the hopes that it would make the paragraph containing it more exciting.

So right now, if they made a set with The Blue Beetle, Max Lord, The Elongated Man, Sue Dibny, Rocked Red, Ice, Crimson Fox, The Martian Manhunter, and Mr. Miracle and called it "We're sorry about killing these guys, honest", I'd still wait until it went on sale.

I understand that to establish dramatic tension, something needs to be at stake. I understand that superheroics is a dangerous job. I understand that DC isn't selling us a static, unchanging world - they put out hundreds of pages each month. It's just that being a former member of Justice League International puts you at the top of the hit list. I don't intend to start reading comic books again any time soon. If I found a series I liked, it'd end eventually. Then they'd start killing off the characters when other stories needed a bit more drama.

There's a mini-map and a large map. If you click on a place on either, you don't move towards it. Quests only show on the large map. You buy your skills at a shop. This means you can't see the skill tree for your character unless you're at that shop.. There's nothing stopping you from buying skills you can't use because you're the wrong class.

Monsters talk to you. They say things like "What's one plus one? Wrong. It's three". Now, I think talking monsters are great. It let's you give them a bit of character and gives a bit of backstory to the ten palate-swapped guys you just made up. But don't make them painfully stupid. Why was I killing them? Because some guy promised me a pair of boots and there wasn't anything else to do. They probably deserved it, though.

Also, the multi-talented Wil Wheaton as The Blue Beetle.


I remember the Blue Beetle back when he was thin. And living. I was a huge fan of Blue Beetle and Booster Gold back in the Justice League International days. I haven't bought superhero comics in since then, but that's a whole 'nother post in itself (which I probably would've put up today if it weren't for all the cool videos). Anyhow, I'm a huge Wil Wheaton fan. To me this is like putting two awesome things together and coming up with something even more awesome. Like the opposite of pizza ice cream.

And Kevin & Kell has been reinstated in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution - in color! As the folks who color it, we're chuffed as chips. Thank you, everyone who voted!

If you said something nice, we read it and really appreciate it. I'm very glad you enjoy our work; if people didn't enjoy it, it wouldn't be worth doing. We meant to send you a reply that said something like this, but more personal, and hope you continue to enjoy the comics.

If you pointed out something that needed to be fixed, I probably fixed it. I usually do that when I'm on my way out the door and don't have time to send something better than "Thanks! Fixed!". If I didn't fix it, or if there's something else that got spelled wrong, please email me again so I can get it corrected.

If you sent us condolences on our niece's death, we appreciate your support in difficult times.

If you sent us fanart, please, please re-send it so we can put it up properly.

If you sent us anything else or would just like a more personal reply, please e-mail us again.

Also, on Monday, January 12th, the Atlanta Jounal-Constitution cut 13 comic strips. One of those strips is Kevin & Kell, which we color. They're having a poll to determine which two strips get brought back - the full details are available at kevinandkell.com. We ask that you please vote for Kevin & Kell, especially if you live in the Atlanta region.

Sorry about all the posts; it's been a busy day.

It has a decent tutorial section. You start out on their equivalent of Noob Island and they send you on a lot of quests. If Alice sends you to find Bill, you need to talk to Bill once to finish the "Find Bill" quest, a second time when he asks you if you're ready for the next quest, and a third time when he actually gives you the quest. Just a minor issue, though.

There's a decent range of appearance customization when you start. You choose a horoscope sign and season, as well. I mention this only because it gives you various bonuses. I do not like it when a game has you make what might be major decisions then makes you wait an hour before telling you what the consequences of that may be.

The game has a non-navigable mini-map and a manually controlled camera. The graphics settings are not adjustable.

I died while exiting a dungeon. When I got out, I didn't see any NPCs. I logged off. When I logged back on, I was in a new city. My spawn point was in a woodpile. I couldn't move. I don't think there were any GMs on. I'm not sure there was anybody on, actually.

Reading about it online, I found that the game's currency is MetaTIX, which can only be bought with real cash money. It costs money to go into some (most?) dungeons. The game hints that you can just trade things to other players, to avoid paying. The player base doesn't seem big enough to realistically support this. The literature mentions these being accepted in many different games, but Monato Esprit is the only one they actually name.

The game's classes include Harlequin, Hwarang, and Sheriff. It sounds like the design concept was "Let's take the awesomest stuff we can find and toss it all in". The Templar and Hwarang seem similarly tankish and I'm not sure what the difference between the Sheriff and Mage are, much less what the Harlequin actually does in game terms. Again, stuck in a woodpile.

Secondly, I've been a bit busy for the last month or two. Working a lot of overtime. If you emailed me and I didn't get back to you, it's because I pretty much didn't get back to anybody. I'm taking a break from my game search for a bit. I still have about five reviews to write and post.

I know the tone of things has been a bit negative lately. I fail to mention most games' good points. I'm trying to find the right game for me. This is why they aren't it. If you enjoy the game, I hope you continue to enjoy it, and aren't waiting for my validation. Also, I enjoy listening to myself complain.

I've been thinking more about what I want in games. Like an automatic camera. I like the option of adjusting it manually, but when I turn I want the camera to turn with me. I want the camera behind and above me about 98% of the time when I play, so why do I have to move it myself every time I turn? It's 2009. Computers should be able to do this on their own.

Noob Island is a fairly clever idea. I had overlooked how clever it was because it seemed completely obvious to me. I keep finding games that don't give you much any tutorial or instruction. I want a quick walkthrough of the controls, what classes there are, and such. I want to have stuff to do at least until I hit level 10.

A lot of games dump you in the hub city. There's the NPC for that level 50 quest standing by the gate asking if you have any copper marbles. You, being new, don't realize that they're only dropped by greatly huge dragons who can kill you as a free action, so you're trying to figure out if you have any, and where you get them. There's 30 mostly-identical NPCs standing around, so finding the five that you actually need is hard, and making the game hard isn't condusive to keeping me as a player. Give me a small area with five NPCs, free healing, and nothing that can kill me in one hit until I decide to leave Noob Island.

I want a tutorial that explains things concisely and as I need them. If there's a green bar in the upper right that I'm not going to use until I hit level 15, don't even show it to me when I'm on noob island. I want to be able to pull up a cheat sheet that tells me what an enchantment does and how it's different from an inspiration, especially if one is difficult to obtain and/or permanent. Maybe I wasn't paying much attention the the tutorial. I do that sometimes. And don't just show me the tutorial again. If I didn't sit through it the first time, I probably won't sit through it the second time.

One of the design principals of Final Battle Adventure Online is that you don't have to make decisions before they're relevant, and that very few decisions are immediately permanent. (Gender is, for instance, because it doesn't affect gameplay, and because you should know which one you want to play as). Don't make me start out the game and decide if I want a bonus to magical defence or physical attack before I do anything else. I don't know if, say, there are only three enemies that use magical attack, or that you can buy attack boosters at any shop in town.

If I'm an archer, I want to start out shooting things with arrows. If I'm a cleric, I want to start out healing things. Don't make me spend the first four hours hitting rats with a stick, as if I'm some kind of incompetent fighter.

Anyhow, that's what I'm looking for in a game. I'll let you know when I find it.

I tried two of them, Mythwar II and Angel Online. They were both isometric 2D sprite-based games (hence my suspicion).

There were differences. In Mythwar II, monster encounters would be random and would take you from the overworld to a separate combat screen. It reminded me a lot of the original Final Fantasy. More accurately, it reminded me of those parts in Final Fantasy II when I was wandering cluelessly and kept getting ambushed. It had Active Time Battles, which premiered in Final Fantasy IV.

Mythwar has four races: Humans, Mages, Centaurs, and Borg. I'm not sure how they avoided an infringement suit from Paramount. The second thing I noticed was the Centaurs. None of the other reviews I saw mentioned this (which makes me wonder about the standards of internet game review journalism). The centaurs? Two legs. Not horselike in any way. Slightly less horselike than the humans, actually. I found that slightly odd. It's the kind of thing you'd think someone would notice. One of the subclasses of Centaurs is "Elves". I suppose I can accept that because this is Mythwar. The myths are losing.

Angel Online has about twelve different classes. There are four different kinds of fighters. They all start out hitting things with sticks. There are four different crafting-oriented classes. They ride around in giant robots....that hit things with sticks.

Both games drop you in the middle of a giant hub city with minimal instructions. Angel Online has a "tutorial" that shows you how to talk to people and hit things with sticks. My next character was a Mechanic, which apparently mines ore and builds robots out of it. I got the same tutorial on hitting things with sticks. How do I build robots? No idea. I guess I just didn't have the Spark.

It's difficult to make a game about angels. There are two ways to do it. You can either have a very preachy religious game or you can have a game set in fluffy-cloud heaven designed by somebody who fell asleep during sunday school.

The important NPCs include the archangel Raphael, the archangel Michael, and Cupid. Presumably because he has wings in some of the Renaissance paintings and because, like the Centaurs, they just didn't care enough. The backstory includes a love triangle between Lucifer, some girl angel, and some boy angel. It didn't end well. So, yeah, fluffy-cloud heaven. I'm not sure if this is more sacreligious or less sacreligious than the alternative. Probably less, considering that the alternative involves smiting rats and wolves with the Power of Jesus. And only doing 38 damage.

Anyhow, how different are the games? About as different as Mario Party 4 and Mario Party 6.

*: That's a false comparison, mind you, because after the days-long archive trawl, keeping up with both takes an extra couple minutes a day. MMORPGs pretty much demand a few hours at a time to progress.

You get skills by walking around and talking to people. There are about a dozen dialogue topics, and if you talk to people a lot, you get better stuff. I'm not sure if you can unlock skills by talking to the same person 100 times in one day or if you have to talk to them once a day over 100 days. I'm not sure which is worse, either

Everyone has the same generic topics. I'm supposed to keep track of which shopkeepers like talking about "skills" or "farmlands". If I wanted to spend weeks getting to know video game characters, I'd play Animal Crossing. That way I could at least choose what I say. The Pete/Pelly/Phyllis love triangle is more interesting anyhow.

Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker is a gorgeous, amazing game. I was expecting Tetra to be more like Midna and was disappointed at the lack of screen time the pirates got; I suppose that just means that Twilight Princess was a better Zelda game. Nothing wrong with that. I tried playing this game back in 2004 originally, got horribly lost when I first started sailing around and put the game down for four years. Then I got a guide and picked it back up. I enjoyed the game, but I don't imagine anybody was waiting for my endorsement before buying it.

Battalion Wars - I liked the Advance Wars games, which this is marginally related to. This game has elements of both the real time strategy and first person shooter genre. By which I mean you have to do both at once. You're trying to coordinate five different troop types at once, and there's no AI to speak of. The vehicles have a MarioKart-on-ice floatiness to them. The sixth mission has you taking on a far superior force with no reinforcements or repair. I failed at it about four times in a row (doing different dumb things each time), didn't enjoy it, and haven't picked up the game again.